Tony Dungy Knows How To Retire

I know I’ve dogged on Tony Dungy in the past, but you have to admire a guy who finishes his season, takes a week to think about it, and then decides with conviction what he’s going to do about the next year. The last few years after his week of consideration, he said he’s staying. This year, he said he’s retiring. And you know he’s staying retired. ARE YOU SEEING THIS BRETT FAVRE, YOU FUCKING DRAMA QUEEN?!? THIS IS HOW AN ADULT MAKES UP HIS MIND ABOUT SOMETHING!

Anyway, the Tampa media is going to be pressure-washing Dungy’s balls for quite a while this time. The Tribune already has five articles up, including what guys like Derrick Brooks, Warrick Dunn, Monte Kiffin and Shaun King had to say about him.

"It's unbelievable," King said. "The way he allowed me to have my opportunity to realize my dream and when you look at me, and this speaks louder than anything I can say, here's a guy who cut me in Indianapolis for a team I deserved to be on and a tear just welled up [thinking about him]."

Do you like how he slipped in how he should have made the Colts? Oh, please. You never deserved to be on that team, Shaun. Jim Sorgi beat you fair and square.

This is a good time for him to leave coaching. Before the outpouring of affection that he’s getting now that he’s stepping down, the local Indianapolis media was turning on him for another twelve win season with nothing to show for it.

One and done.

Or, should we say, one and Dungy.

Hey, Indy has their very own Martin Fennelly!

It’s the same as it was in Tampa up until the point where the Glazers fired him. Then everyone was all up in arms about how they were letting such a great man go. Now, he can just be the man everyone admires without the baggage of having to be responsible for an NFL team. The newspapers can gush over him harmlessly because all he’ll be doing is good deeds (well, good deeds and shouting down the queers) and no one will have to talk about how he went “one and Dungy” again. When football does come up, everyone can remember the Super Bowl season and how he finally got his day in the sun. Everyone wins.

I have a feeling that if I knew him personally, we’d politely keep the conversation away from anything controversial because we’d most likely be at polar opposites of every argument. And that’s fine. In all honesty, I’m sure he’s going to do some great things and make a difference in people’s lives. People in Tampa are going to benefit from his increased presence in the community. If so many of the Buccaneers that I respect feel so strongly about him, I have to give him that credit. I’d just like to remind everyone that other people also do good things around the community as well.

Hey, look at that. I did manage to find a picture of Dungy with a different expression on his face.