The Bucs Stories That Won’t Mercifully Die

There are a couple stories out there that seem to be gaining traction despite the fact that the chances of either actually happening are ridiculously small. So why am I giving them added credence by reporting on them myself? Hey, I either write this so you have something to read or doing your real job and filing your TPS Report or adding animation to that Powerpoint presentation or whatever the fuck it is you do.

The first one is the whole Brett Favre unretirement talk that started the same day he held his press conference where he cried and reminisced and, you know... retired. He never quite said "I'm Done!" like Warren Sapp did, but he did say he didn't want to play anymore. Peter King and his ever-loyal erection for Favre kept the ball rolling with his report a few days ago that Favre would notify the Packers that he wanted to be removed from the retired list within ten days. And now guys like Mike Florio and Bill Williamson are throwing the Buccaneers out there as one of the more likely teams to try and make a play for Favre. And that is the only reason why I bring up Favre at all.

Keep in mind that the only word coming directly from Favre was to a reporter in Mississippi who quoted Favre as saying it was all rumor and there was no reason for it. No, it's not the "I'm staying retired now leave me alone" that would make all of this go away, but I think Favre really is confused at this point and isn't prepared to say anything so definitive. This is the first summer in, what, 30 years that Favre isn't preparing for next season? It feels weird to him, he's missing it and thinks that may mean that he should play again. But I really don't think he will. I think he'll realize why he made his decision when he's not in training camp and doesn't miss the two-a-days and endless meetings that go along with August football.

And even if he were to come back, the obstacles preceding a contract with Tampa Bay are huge. Green Bay would have to make the decision to go with Aaron Rodgers over Favre and accept the brutal public outcry that goes along with that. He's untradable at his salary, so they'd have to release him outright and face the risk of Favre signing with a division rival. Then the Bucs would have to come to the conclusion that an out-of-shape Favre who doesn't know the system and hasn't worked with any of the receivers or linemen is better than a Jeff Garcia who has been with Jon Gruden for over a year now and, despite his contract-related crying, has been to every OTA and minicamp working with the guys he'll be throwing to during the season. That's what some people seem to be forgetting. Any other team that were to sign Brett Favre isn't necessarily going to get the Favre that played so well last year. Not when he has to learn new terminology and get a working rapport with all his other offensive players. That takes time -- time that Favre has thus far spent on a tractor. At this stage for the Bucs, I really think Garcia gives the team a better chance to win than Favre. And even if Gruden and Bruce Allen were to disagree with me, someone has to convince the Glazers to write the check that Favre would command for one season. Ten million, maybe? They have it in the cap, but are they willing to part with it when the very real possibility exists that they could get the 2005 Favre that had a 20/29 TD/INT ratio instead of last year's Favre? I really, really doubt it.

The other story that has maybe a tinge more credibility but is still ridiculous is the one where Kevin Jones is saying how he wants to come to Tampa. It looks like the Bucs have actually scheduled a visit with Jones for next week. Unless the team is planning something really radical like keeping four true tailbacks in addition to a fullback, the visit is just due diligence in case something happens during the season and they need a running back real quick. Again, Warrick Dunn isn't getting cut and Earnest Graham is probably pretty safe, too. Michael Bennett is the guy most likely to get cut, but he's much faster than Jones and is also making himself useful on special teams. I really think Bennett makes the team. And then there's Cadillac Williams who will probably start the season on the PUP list but is making excellent progress. They weren't interested enough in Jones to attend his public workout a couple weeks back, but they'll buy him a plane ticket and check him out at home and file that information away for later if they need it.

Look, I want stuff to talk about as much as everyone else. I was really kind of depending on this off time being filled with story after story of Buccaneers getting into fights or beating up hookers or getting loaded and plowing into a family of six. I mean, I've heard so much about the terrible character of the team, it just seemed natural that they would all spend their vacations being criminals. But no, nothing. Just football camps and hospital visits. But that's no excuse to just make shit up. That's like taking food out of Rick Stroud's mouth.