What Gruden Thinks About His Players, Draft Picks

During the owners meetings, Jon Gruden was asked about his players and potential draft picks. I want to look at what he said about various Bucs, and various draft picks. First off, I want to start with my favorite quote:

On Quarterbacks:

“I keep telling Bruce Allen I’d like to coach a first-rounder (at quarterback) sometime before I’m out of the league. I wouldn’t mind coaching one. Guys do get picked in the first round for a reason.”

(Translation: I need more quarterbacks.)

On His Players:

Brian Griese: “I like Brian. He’s smart. Above the neck, he’s rare and I’m happy to have him back.”

(Rare above the neck? Is he cooking him or something?)

Luke McCown: “Luke McCown has shown some promise. If he can eliminate some of the boneheaded plays-turnovers deep in our territory, taking a couple of sacks he didn’t need to take-he’ll improve.”

(Maybe it’s just me, but doesn’t everyone improve once they eliminate mistakes?)

Chris Simms: “It’s hard to accommodate everyone’s wants and wishes. We paid Chris Simms $7.5 million. We want to win. He’s part of our plans and we want him to compete.”

(This is Gruden subtly telling Simms to suck it up and get back on the field.)

Warrick Dunn: “Inside of him, there’s a war daddy.”

(????)

Jeff Faine: “I don’t know about his contract, the highest salary ever for a center. I just hope he doesn’t start acting like a quarterback.”

(Translation: Quarterbacks are overpaid crybabies.)

Jake Plummer: “He’s retired…They say I collect quarterbacks. One of them hasn’t played in two years (Chris Simms), and one of them is retired.”

(Translation: I need more overpaid crybabies.)

On Draft Picks:

DeSean Jackson: “I mean the guy at Cal is 169 pounds. Is he going to be big enough? He’s certainly fast as hell. He’d be a hell of a returner.”

(When will Gruden learn that size doesn’t matter? Or maybe it does. I don’t know.)

James Hardy: “The guy at Indiana is big. Every film you pick up there’s another touchdown. Is he fast enough? We’ve got [Maurice] Stovall, what the hell have we’ve got him for? You don’t want to stock guys.”

(A big slap in the face to Stovall. Was he joking…or was it his way of saying that Stovall is worthless?)

Joe Flacco: “I think his (Senior) Bowl game performance really helped him. I think when you watch [Chad] Henne and [Eric] Ainge and you watch Colt Brennan and all the guys who were there in Mobile, I think Flacco helped himself. He stood out there. He’s a big guy, poised and confident. People liked his stroke. People liked the way he threw the football. He’s thrown for a gazillion yards and dominated the level of competition.”

(Listen to the way he’s bragging on Flacco. Who says he doesn’t want a quarterback?)

Josh Johnson: “45 touchdowns and one interception. That’s hard to do. Then you watch the East-West game and watch him run around and make plays.”

(Otherwise very little insight on Johnson, the kid very few people know.)

Mike Jenkins: “I like him. We had an individual workout at our facility. I like the mentality that the USF kids have. They’ve been well coached and the kid has talent. Watching college tape is a lot different for me now than it used to be five years ago. Everybody is in spread offenses. Everybody. There’s not as much two back play-action as there used to be. It’s hard to evaluate. A lot of bubble screens and quick screens. It’s not like you’re the corner and I’m the wideout and I’m running an out route or a slant route. You might be running a bubble screen. The linebackers as well, they’re not in the box taking on a fullback. I do like Jenkins, though.

(He lost me after “They’ve been well coached.” A lot of rambling to sum up his point: he likes Mike Jenkins.)

Back to his reference to Plummer. It appears that Gruden, much like every Bucs fan, has given up on Plummer. According to the St. Petersburg Times, Gruden has all but said forget Jake.