Can’t A Man Ride A Tractor In Peace?

Brett Favre announced his retirement in March and then exactly one month later, the rumors are already starting that he wants to come back to the game that he hasn't had time to miss yet. It's a headline in just about every football publication and TV show and I can't understand why. When you've got Chad Johnson out there acting a fool and team owners having to publicly apologize for cheating and Chris Henry doing what Chris Henry always does, not to mention the draft just over three weeks away, you'd think there'd be enough to cover without making shit up.

According to NFL sources, Favre's agent has quietly inquired with teams about their interest in trading for the three-time NFL most valuable player. The sources did not indicate whether Favre knew of the inquiries.

This is not happening. Ever. One of the reasons Favre is loved so much around the league is because he is sincere, almost to a fault. When he said last month that he doesn't want to play the game, I'm pretty sure you can believe him. You know what this is? If anything happened at all, Bus Cook probably asked some front office guy for some team what he thought Favre was worth in trade... purely out of curiosity. It would be interesting to know; he started off as a second round pick, was worth a first rounder to the Packers in trade... what's he worth now another 16 years later? How well did he hold his value over such a long stretch? I do the same thing with my collection of vintage Barbies. Every now and then, I'll look on eBay to see what they're going for, but I have no intention of ever parting with them. It's just nice to know how much something is worth.

Umm, did I say Barbies? I meant G.I. Joes. Wait, is that more or less gay?