18 Months = Not Enough Time Off For Simms

Chris Simms has spent the last 19 months of his life throwing seven interceptions in his last three games, rupturing his spleen and then taking the next 18 months off. During this time, the Buccaneers brought Jeff Garcia in from free agency and traded for Jake Plummer and Brian Griese, all while paying Simms $7.1 million. You might think that all of these factors would make Simms eager for the offseason training and conditioning activities to start and motivate him to put his best foot forward to show the team that he is back to 100% health and can be the quarterback that he had always claimed he had the potential to be.

But you would be wrong (dumb ass...)

Simms has decided to skip the quarterback orientation and the first offseason workouts. To be fair, they are voluntary. But, I dunno, after collection over $7 million from a team for really doing nothing, I'd think he'd feel he kind of owes it to them to show up to whatever the team is doing now that he's healthy. But I would be wrong (dumb ass...)

Simms said he has split time between working out on his own in Tampa and traveling to New Jersey, where he has thrown with friends and his father, former Giants Super Bowl quarterback Phil Simms.

So that's his workout. Throwing the football in the back yard with his dad. I'm guessing he's playing vigorous games of freeze tag to build up his fast-twitch muscles, too. Jesus Christ, are you kidding me?

"I just think... it's in my best interest to continue my own workouts and to just wait and see what happens with the team," Simms said. "I don't really know what's going to happen. As far as the Bucs and the quarterback position goes, it's always an adventure."

He's been with Jon Gruden for five years now. Is Simms just figuring out that he's weird about quarterbacks? Gruden signed Akili Smith a couple years ago, for fuck's sake. Of course it's an adventure. But how is it in his best interest to not show up? This sounds like a tactic his agent put in his head to force some kind of issue, but Simms has no leverage. Zero. If he wanted to, he could compete with Griese for the backup spot. Gruden picked Simms over Griese a couple years ago to start, so it's not like it's such a remote possibility.

The Bucs are going to dump at least one quarterback sooner rather than later, most likely in a trade. I had just hoped that Simms would fight for the chance to be one of the ones that sticks around. At the very least, he should act like he's still a Buccaneer until he's not. He's not proving anything except that he isn't exactly the lovable lefty everyone thinks he is and he can, in fact, be a crybaby douche when he wants to be. Yes, part of this is personal. I've been in Simms's corner from day one. Even when I was sure he would get cut last summer, I was sad about it. I really thought "Simms to Clayton" was going to be the next "Montana to Rice", with Cadillac Williams providing that constant running threat. Was that really only three years ago?

The article mentions Green Bay and Minnesota as teams that are looking for a quarterback, but I think he winds up in Miami. Bill Parcells has known Simms through his dad his whole life and I'm sure has some kind of affection for him. I'm not sure what kind of offense Tony Sparano is installing, but it's got to be more complimentary to Simms's skills than the West Coast Offense. They invested a second round pick in John Beck last year, but no one seems to be giving him a chance to land as the starter -- I'm not sure why. Whatever the reason, it gives a veteran quarterback an opportunity to push him aside. I think that veteran will be Simms.

One other note about the article...

Coincidentally, it was Simms' performance in 2005 that prompted Griese's departure from Tampa Bay.

I know I've said some nasty things about Rick Stroud in the past, but let me give some credit where credit is due. Nine out of ten writers these days would have incorrectly used the word "ironically" to lead that sentence. Stroud got it right. People notice. I also noticed that Stroud never mentioned the word "proprioception", even when he explained Simms's condition in the last sentence. Bravo. See, I can be nice to Tampa media.