Garcia Wants To Extend Career, Bloodline

Jeff Garcia took a few minutes (five, precisely) to talk to Mike McAllister about the same shit that everyone always asks him. One interesting point was a little more talk about his future with the Buccaneers.

"Well, [Gruden] keeps telling me that he needs me to play another 4-5 years. If that's what he thinks ... I still look at it as one year at a time.

I'm sure Gruden told him that, but Gruden also tells every ambulatory college player that he's definitely going to draft him. Gruden gets a bit overexcited about these things. Another 4-5 years? Unless Garcia plans to take up placekicking, I just can't see him on a roster past 40. George Blanda was the exception because he sat on the bench for about half of his career. Garcia takes too many helmet-to-helmets to last that long and still be able to chew his own food when he's 50.

And I'm about two months late on this one, but apparently Carmella Garcia (or DeCesare or whatever the fuck her name is now) is pregnant. By Jeff, no less. Suck it, T.O.

"You know, your body doesn't respond as well as it did 5-6 years ago. But you know, my life has changed as opposed to 5-6 years ago. I'm married now. We're going to have a child in a couple of months. So many things that have changed in a positive way, I think, makes me more stable in my own life."

Evidently, Jeff's body is responding just fine. I can't believe I missed this story. I mean, I thought Jeff and I had this agreement that he would call me whenever he and Carmella had sex so that I could visualize it while I gently choked myself with a noose I made out of her used nylons that I bought on eBay. I never did get a call, but I just assumed he was saving himself up until after the season Now that I think about it, I guess the restraining order should have been my first clue that he wasn't totally on board. Some friend he turned out to be.